Summer School

I have been on a severe emotional roller coaster and I am unclear as to why... I mean there are a lot of things I am facing but I am normally not so up and down, but I have been lately, and it bothers me. For the most part life is going well. I do not like the fact that I am teaching summer school but I am really enjoying the students that I have. I actually love this class. But, it is hard to wake up everyday with the sun out and knowing that this is an optional thing and something that is extra. But this extra will be what saves me financially and allows me to save. Saving is just something I haven't been able to do and it frustrates me. Things come up. Tires get slashed and a new set of tires had to be purchased, gas now costs me $200 a month on top of $300 a month in insurance. I get so overwelmed by all of this. I find it even harder because in order to make friends and go out and be social, things cost money, like going out to eat or to the movies, etc. I need to grow up and get rid of all the debt I carry from college and paying for going abroad, text books, etc, then life will be a little easier, at least financially.

The new 2008 corps arrived in Houston this week and this is their first day observing classrooms and sitting through sessions. My elementary school is one of 4 elementary schools hosting Teach For America's summer institute... it honestly makes me cringe seeing them and seeing all the posters on the walls of their schedules, expectations, rules, etc it brings me back to last year and the horrendously tiring and tough experience TFA laid upon my freshly graduated and very naive to the urban teaching world soul. I do not wish to be them, not even for a second do I wish to go back to the beginning of TFA and start things over... I am ready for next year and one more step closer toward completing two years of very tough public service. Anxiety now begins to rest on what I to do next, I seriously am stuck, not even a clue anymore as what to do with life.

Summer plans are to finish coaching (2 more weeks) and finish summer school (July 3), and take two different classes to complete the certification process so that I can teach next year. The certification process is uberly irritating. In order to even transfer my teaching certifcate out of Texas I will have had to teach in Texas for two years, something I am not real thrilled on doing! If I stay in Texas it is not to teach. I hope to go home at some point for a week or two this summer... i just need to figure out when that is going to be. I also hope to go to San Fransisco for the 4th of July to be with John's family and meet mom there.

I have so much more to say but not really the urge to keep writing, maybe more later.

Much love,
Robert