I guess a lot has happened!

I have wanted to write for quite awhile now, but every time I sit down to do so, there is not much to say. But, I guess there is. Let me begin with yesterday. After delivering some Intelligence tests to be scored at the district office, I arrived back at school mid afternoon to my principal sitting in a chair next to a 4th grade student who I will call John. She was clearly very upset with this boy and as I walked in the office, I said hello to my principal and she replies with, I am so glad to see you. She continues by telling me all about this students who is sitting in the office and the horrible horrible behavior he exhibited in his classroom pervious to my arrival. He had a substitute African American teacher who he called the "n" word to and said many other profanities out loud in class. He was sent to the office. He had received a referral the week prior and now needed to be suspended. My principal, who has a lot of experience working with Asperger's students from her previous school, told me he acted just the way they did. I don't know if he has Asperger's nor does she but he was showing similar behavior traits, but I will not make an assumption so for now, I will continue with him being unlabeled. Anyway, as my principal was explaining his behavior to me and he was sitting there spaced out looking to the ceiling, I could not help by well up in tears, I have no idea why, but I got really emotional. My principal asked me to take this boy back to my room until his mother could pick him up.

I took John back to my class. I spoke to him about his behavior and how it was affecting others. He told me about his family, his 8 siblings, his divorced parents, his mother who is taking care of his dying grandmother and raising 8 kids at the same time, and his abusive 12 year old brother that hits John and is verbally abusive. A lot for this 8 year old. I told him that his behavior toward his substitute caused a similar feeling for the substitute just as when John's 12 year older brother is verbally abusive to him. He began to cry. I think he realized how much his actions hurt the substitute and the people in his class. I asked him what the problem was--he replied with, "the classroom had a new teacher and there was too much change" and "the class was too noisy he could not work". (these traits are classic Asperger's as students with this condition cannot handle change in routine nor loud over stimulating noises). John also explained that he has no friends and that people are mean to him. But, I explained, he needs to be nice to people for people to be nice to him (he is known for telling kids off and being really rude)


So, John and I talked. I told him that his behavior needs to change and that it is unacceptable. I told him I was here for him; I asked him what I could do for him. He told me he wanted me to be his friend, so we are friends now. I am hoping that I can help him change his behavior and learn coping strategies for loud noises, change in routine, how to make friends. His mother never came to pick him up so John and I read a book about whales. While we read I played him some whale sounds from a cd I have so he could hear what they sound like. After the story he wrote a paragraph about whales and what he learned. Then he did some math and showed me his 4th grade math skills.

John validates why I joined Teach For America and decided to spend these next two years in Houston.

I really love my job. I still don't technically have kids enrolled in the Asperger's program. I was promoted to be the Gifted and Talented coordinator in addition to being a Special Ed teacher. My school is paying for me to get my GT credential, which will be very helpful in the future. I am now on the administration team and have been interviewing candidates for the Teacher Assistant position for my classroom. My principal and assistant principal are two amazing women who are such a great resource for me and are teaching me a lot!

So, school is good. I hate Houston and miss having close relationships. I feel very alone here but as of now have coped. I need close relationships down here. I miss Whitman so much and look forward to visiting in October. I decided that I need to distance myself from TFA and all the TFA and teacher drama, I need to get away from teachers and find other people to talk to and get to know. So, I joined the YMCA Master's swim team and have been swimming with several guys that also just graduated from college. They are fast swimmers and are really fun to swim with. Swimming makes me so happy and allows me to escape TFA for at least a little while each week.

In addition, I have been going to St. Martin's Episcopal Church. I really like it. The church is a beautiful cathedral with beautiful music. They have a Sunday night service and a wonderful young adults group. It is hard going alone but is something I am getting used to.

Last weekend I went to San Antonio for the day. I went to Sea World and saw the orca show. I don't know how many of you know how much Free Willy changed my life and how obsessed with whales I was when I was younger (possibly still?) but this show was amazing. I had a blast!!! I was able to pet dolphins and see belugas and seals and sea lions too! I could live there! After Sea World I spent some time on the San Antonio river walk and briefly saw the Alamo, I definitely want to go back.

Well, sorry this was so long. Please leave messages or email me, I love you all and miss you terribly.

Much love,
Robert

2nd day of school

Today was the second day of school, I am so tired! I am having a blast as I am going through this adventure. As you all know, my placement is a Special Ed teacher working with Asperger's students... but i don't have kids in my program yet. Sooooo, I have been temporarily placed in kindergarten to co-teach in a classroom with 27 kids. It has been CRAZY. First, the teacher I am co-teaching with (she is the one in charge of lesson plans, management, etc as it is her regular classroom) does not have the greatest of management skills nor has any sort of organization. So, the room is really hectic and I am afraid to take too much control since its not my room, although I did today as I had to teach for the afternoon, more on that in a second.

Today was insane. I cleaned up vomit, had a kid spit on me, and dealt with 4 kids with the worst behavior I have ever witnessed in children, one of which has fetal alcohol syndrom and has a chronic behavior problem that is REALLY hard to manage. The highlight today was losing a kid for two hours. I had a meeting today at lunch and when I got back to the kindergarten classroom, the teacher that I am working with informed me that she was missing a kid. I ran to the office and told them. Announcements went over the intercom, all teachers were told to count their kids, and the search went on. We looked all over the school and neighborhood, the police were called, the media was called, and the parents. It was a disaster. Finally, I decided to check every kindergarten class again and personally count the kids myself (after the teachers were told to count the kids three different times)... and alas, I found little Eddie just chilling in the bilingual class (which is funny because he is not in a bilingual class). I took little Eddie to the office where he was welcomed by the whole search crew, including his FREAKED out and EXTREMELY upset parents who decided to scream and yell and punch the walls in the office. I understand their anger, their kid was missing and the teachers did not properly count their students. In addition, the teacher did not even recognize that there was a strange student in her class who was not wearing her classes special name tag. CRAZINESS. After this whole ordeal, I had to teach for the afternoon because my co-teacher was too distraught after losing a kid and getting reprimanded by our principal (oh! and the superintendent was at school today to give my principal her evaluation and review while this all happened!)

So, I am tired. I love kindergarten but would have a hard time doing it for two years. Much love to you all.

We reported to work on Monday, after two days in the classroom in meetings and setting up, things are looking a little better. I am really excited to get my students. Right now, there aren't any students in my program; there won't be any until after the school year starts. So, right now, I am trying to learn as much as possible about Asperger's and the types of students that I will be working with. I have been busy setting up my classroom so that it is conducive to the way students with high functioning autism/asperger's learn the best. My classroom will be a relaxing, peaceful, soft atmosphere which studies show is the atmosphere that these students need. My job is going to be to co-teach with the students' general education teacher as much as possible so that my students are mainstreamed as much as possible. I will only be able to pull my students out a little bit each day to work on social behavior skills, relationship building, etc. I should eventually have 10 or so students whos case loads I will be taking on.

While my classroom is large and in good condition, I do not have a lot of stuff, namely books. If anyone would like to send me books, I would love it! Used books are much appreciated. In addition, I am trying to figure out a way to get a tv for my classroom and a cd player/stereo. Children with autism need soft music in their working environment and learn well from instructional videos that show relationships and good behavior.

I went to Indiana a week ago and had the most wonderful trip ever. I went up to visit Kendi, my girlfriend. We had a wonderful time. We watched senior national swim championships, I watched her bike race (and win all three races!), went to Bloomington, and saw many Greencastle sites. It was so nice being there and seeing her friends and where she grew up. Unfortunately, because of the horrible distance (she is still a student at Whitman), we decided to break up. I flew back to Houston absolutely miserable. The last place I wanted to fly to was Houston, a city I am VERY slowly learning to appreciate. I am slowly getting better but still really sad.

I am in class right now, we have class 3 nights a week from 5:30-8:30 in addition to every other Sunday, this schedule is horrible for a first year teacher, Teach For America does a wonderful job keeping us busy and NOT relaxed.

Roberto

Drivin

We're in Fort Stockton, TX right now, don't worry I had never heard of it either and there's a reason. There is nothing here! We are staying at a hotel along the interstate, mom is currently terrified of cock roaches and trying desperately not to see one... just wait until she gets to Houston. Her first comment upon getting out of the car tonight, was wow, it's muggy! My comment was, man this feels good for Texas... I think Houston will be a shock for her! The journey has been fun. We drove from Portland to the bay area on Monday, left at 3 am and spent 12 hours driving. We arrived around dinnertime just in time for my little cousin Will's graduation from day Care/pre School. I was greeted by the newest addition to our family, little Alexandra Grace. Sasha as she is called (the Russian name for Alexandra) is 5 weeks old and the most beautiful baby girl in the world, she is wonderful; I could not put her down!

We then drove down to LA and spent the night at Erin Farrell's parents house in Redondo Beach. It was nice to see her family again; we were greeted with such amazing hospitality. The following day we spent 13 hours in Disney Land, so much fun! I had never been before! We had a great time. We stayed another night in LA then made the long haul to Albuquerque, NM. The drive was long but worth it. We stayed at Clint's house. We went to dinner with his family, then Clint showed me all around town. I was really impressed with Albuquerque and surprised by its beauty. Today we drove from Clint's to the middle of nowhere Texas. 5 more hours to go...we will make it tomorrow after a stop in San Antonio.

I have a job! I decided that I would be ok teaching special ed. So, I am going to be at Gallegos Elementary working with my housemate Nels. Gallegos is a beautiful school, fairly new and high performing. Gallegos has placed a huge emphasis on technology in the classroom, which will be fun. My position is a special ed resource specialist working with the regions 8-10 children with Ausberger's. I am going to have a lot to learn and will begin training on Monday to learn methods of working with these students. I am excited because I think my patience and personality will be great for the kids and I will enjoy the one on one work I will get to do.

I appreciate the emails and notes; I miss you guys a lot. Much love to you all! Robert

Its over!

Phew, I made it. I am home now and I cannot tell you how good it feels. Despite only being able to be home for less than 36 hours, it still feels amazing. The weather and the fresh air are enough to make me not want to ever leave this place again. However, I leave tomorrow morning to make the long drive to Houston with Mom. I am excited for the opportunity to spend a great amount of time with her. We have fun stops planned, the bay area to see our newest addition to our family, Disney Land, Albuquerque, and finally Houston. We are lucky enough to get to stay with various friends and relatives along the way.

I am so glad TFA institute ended. I am glad I persevered and survived. A lot of people did not and some were even dismissed in the last few days. I made it though! On Friday I could not wipe a smile off my face. Friday we had an open house with the parents. It was really sad to say goodbye to the boys and girls we have grown attached to. It is hard to realize that they will be out of school for month. School for a lot of these kids is the best thing for them, staying at home during the day is often a really unhealthy environment. School is safe. My kids saw so much improvement, 96% of them met their summer growth goal and all of them improved dramatically on their English speaking and listening skills. I will miss them so much!

Looking back on institute I would probably say it is the hardest thing I have ever done and the most tired I have ever been. I am so glad I stayed with it though and got through the rough times. It made me a much stronger person and ready for any challenges that I am about to face.

I had two job interviews this week. Unfortunately, I will not hear until the end of next week if I got either position. Both positions are in the 5th ward, which is the poorest area of Houston with the highest gang activity. I was extremely shocked at the destitute level when I visited the schools and drove through the neighborhoods. It will be an intense experience for sure. Both positions are 4th grade positions. One of them is at a combined elementary and middle school, which could be very interesting. That position is a 4th grade Language Arts/Social Studies position, something ideal for me!

Well, I need to go pack the car. I am so glad to be home and so fortunate to have been able to grow up in this beautiful part of the country!

Much love,
Robert

the final countdown

Four days left and I can hardly wait. I am tired. I am tired of jumping through hurdle after hurdle, I am tired of living in the nastiest cock roach infested dorm known to man, I am tired of trying to do everything right but somehow not ever being able to, and I am tired of living without paychecks and to think I have another 7 weeks until one will arrive! I really want the next four days to fly by. The past 5 weeks have been horrible. It doesn't help that I don't even have a job yet, yeah one is guaranteed but when 80% of the corps has a placement and I don't, it sucks. Teach For America is supposed to be one of the most prestigious programs in the nation and one of the most respected; I am not seeing it yet. I have been somewhat upset with how a lot of things have gone. I need to be out of institute, in my apartment, and in a classroom with my own kids.

The children are the one thing that keep me going. Its intense how closely our collaborative group has bonded with our students. I love my kids and love the progress that each one of them has made. To see them speak English as if they had been learning it their whole lives, to see them master the "th" sound and the clock (today's lesson I taught) is amazing. This summer has shown me that I have an ability to reach the worst behaving students and invest them in the lessons. The other day Jorge and I had a one on one hour where we read his sight words (words that we have in our brains that we know without having to think about it, such as "they") and read Clifford in English. Jorge said "th" words for the first time perfectly and read the whole book...this is a huge feat for a kid who was diagnosed as two grades below grade level in reading and is a complete bully. I left class teary eyed at his progress.

Thank God also for friends and for bonding in adversity. I've become close to some really outstanding people, which makes this whole thing survivable. Joint misery allows for some intense bonding.

I am really excited to go home in a week and drive down here with Mom, I am excited to get away from Houston for a little while and refocus my mind and attention away from this experience and get it ready for fall.

I really miss you guys; I miss the NW so much. I love you all.
Robert

a quick update

ugh, 2 more weeks! I can see the finish line and I can survive.